Take time when you need to
So for those that check in every week to have a read of my blog will notice I didn’t post last week. I had to take a little time to myself, as it came to a point where all the plates I have been juggling were tipping.
Since I became a mother for the first time, like all I imagine, it has been go from the start and at times overwhelming. My daughter is 7 months now, and for this time I’ve been functioning on very little, and at the start of course, broken sleep. For the past couple months as she has slept mostly through the night, I’ve had at most 5 hours, at least, 3 hours. My evenings weren’t particularly relaxing, even my hobbies were topped with a ample dose of anxiety, a sense of rush and must-do. I would be rushing to tidy and do some cleaning, cook (Rose has a cows milk protein and soya allergy, and we’re raising her vegan, so I prep healthy meals and snacks to then freeze) then try juggle exercise, artwork, website building, trying to make Rose a christmas stocking, spiritual work, reading, completing an online course I’m studying…..It would be around midnight or 1 am when I would make it to bed. Needless to say, it was impossible to all that in a handful of hours, even weeks would go by without any progress on some projects.
After continuous flaps, and a mini meltdown, my husband had been telling me to leave things and go to bed. I protested a few times, while complaining of being drained and exhausted. He told me to leave whatever it was that I was in a flap over, and just go to bed, he would finish bits off. After a couple days, it did make me realize that I did need to rest some more. He’s always saying I don’t switch off, and in some ways he is perhaps right. So last week, after Rose was tucked in her bed, I did the bare essentials, and then headed off to bed. I put all my ‘I should be doing this, this and this’ to the back of my mind, and made it a priority to re-energize and recharge.
It has made me understand that I was very stressed and anxious, that my body was saying ‘no more’ , but I kept saying ‘get up, do more’. I would tell people about it being important to have a rest, yet not take the advice myself, as I felt bad. However, I understand that as a mother, it’s not a sprint, its a marathon, and there are times when everything has to stop and I need to retreat to bed for some early nights. And make a permanent change to go to bed before midnight.
It has made me understand more of the balance of holism and the importance to have balance of mind, body and spirit. Leading up to taking a break, I had been struggling with emotional eating, something that I’ve got quite a history with. I was restricting my diet too much, then eating because of exhaustion/stress/severe hunger, then feeling worse about it all after. Since the break, I’m pleased this has stopped. It was a time of healing. I saw I was not doing as well as I could, and sought support, taking up the advice given. Limit caffeine was a big one – no more 12 coffees a day (seriously, that’s not an exaggeration, I could have that many). I reassessed my diet, (including more carbs and water), set up my angel alter and mediated during a full moon, took walks in nature and did some self energy healing.
Now after making rest a priority when I have spare time, I am slowly introducing my projects back in, but making sure I go to bed at a reasonable hour. I have learnt where the line is to make positive changes for my health, remembering the importance of the principles of holistic health. If one of mind, body and spirit is out of balance, then everything is out of balance.
It seems that as this time of isolation from the Corona virus, a focus on all aspects of health is important. We are all out of our routines, our daily lives suddenly turned and we are now restricted to our homes which can be suffocating and isolating. Lets use this difficult time to be kind to ourselves and others. Do what you can to have some ‘normality’ in your house routine, but don’t feel bad if you haven’t done job x,y and z, or if your children have watched films all morning. If your partner or someone you live with is a key worker right now, understand they are probably feeling stressed and exhausted too, but thank them for their effort and dedication (thank you to all the key workers reading this, you’re all doing amazing at keeping essential services going, keep yourselves well and safe).
Days are going to feel longer and harder (since Rose was born, I have gone out nearly every day for a walk, gone to the library weekly for books and enjoyed a snack together in the cafe as well as weekly visits from my parents) as outings are restricted, but lets make sure we have at least 30 mins at the end of the day to unwind – a book/tv/cup of tea/bath etc.
Keep well and safe